Monday, June 19, 2017

Dear Glennon...

Dear Glennon,

Sister, let me join your long line of fan mail and exclaim, I'M NOT MAD AT YOU ANYMORE!

You see, sister, we met a while ago when you came through my town and when you walked on stage, I jumped up clapping and you gave me the first hug. I'll never forget it.

In your presentation and conversation, you touched on the process of sistering in carpentry. You had written about it before and I read it with my eyes, but hearing you explain it was clarifying in a magical way. I was born into a family that provided me a sister, one I call every day and lean on and she props me up when I can't go on. My sister sisters me. And with her help, I get to sister so many women with whom I don't share a mother.
The very concept makes my jaw drop and my hands go out - just like you did when explaining it on stage. I call it the Sistering Face:

This was all before Love Warrior came out.

When I read Love Warrior, I was nauseated for three days. I felt free and hopeful and embarrassed and a little violated that maybe you had read my journal. I was so lost in my happy, polished, neat and clean marriage. I painted the image of the Love Warrior on a board and hung it on my wall so I would see it roughly 17 times an hour.
I got out paper and pen and did the hard work of self-discovery and awareness by journaling and drawing. I prayed. I called my therapist and saved my pennies.
And here is where I went wonky: I became so engrossed in your story and the similarities with mine, I forgot that I held my own pen and my own paper and my own part of my marriage.
When the next step in your journey did not look like mine, I was angry. Wait - go back! That's not my next step I yelled at you through my laptop (so healthy). I felt betrayed. At the root of that betrayed feeling was fear.

Once I found my big girl pants, I went back to thanking you for your bravery, for your vulnerability, for modeling how to be a Love Warrior...and inviting me to be my own Love Warrior. Not your version, but mine. Simple...and so very difficult.

With a chorus of other sisters, surrounding you near and far, once again, THANK YOU.

No comments: